Every person we meet has a soul, spirit, and conscience. Each person is human, and how you treat them can affect their lives in a positive or negative way. It is very important to treat others as well as we can. No matter how rude or ignorant someone may seem in a moment, it doesn’t mean that’s who they truly are. In the end, it’s not up to us to pick and choose how we treat someone—we should always treat people with kindness.
The Real Meaning of Kindness: A Lesson from 20 Years Ago
When I was in first grade, I remember my second-grade buddy. This person helped me with homework and was my friend for no reason other than being assigned to me. They read books to me and helped me learn whenever the second graders were sent to the first-grade classroom.
These small acts of kindness left a warm impression on my heart, and now I strive to leave a similar impact on others. Imagine how powerful it is for a first grader to feel so respected that, 20 years later, they still remember what it was like to be treated with kindness. I believe that the way we treat others leaves an everlasting impact, influencing us to treat people the way we were treated.
How to Treat Others with Kindness (Even When They Don’t Deserve It)
The saying “treat others the way you want to be treated” holds real importance. Today, people tend to treat others based on how they themselves have been treated, which often leads to a cycle of reciprocated behavior. But if we all got what we deserved, none of us would be treated perfectly because none of us are perfect.
Treating others the way they treat you may work fine—until someone treats you poorly. Does that mean you’ll treat them just as poorly? If you believe in reciprocating others’ behavior, it might feel justified, but what does that really solve? Absolutely nothing.
If someone bumps into you on the street, should you bump them back? Probably not, because this only escalates situations unnecessarily. Even if the other person may “deserve” it, reacting this way doesn’t accomplish anything meaningful. Let it go, and you’ll find yourself in fewer conflicts.
We often hear that what we give out into the world comes back to us. Positive energy brings back positive energy, and negative energy returns as negativity. I’d rather receive good vibes, even if that means using my manners and kindness, even with people who aren’t kind. Being the better person—even when you might feel otherwise—ultimately brings relief and growth.
Why Treating Everyone with Respect is a Choice, Not a Reward
Treating people with respect, especially when they haven’t earned it, is challenging. Many believe respect must be earned, and I understand that. However, this mentality weakens our respect for one another. Without an underlying respect for each other as human beings, it’s easy to simply disregard strangers and acquaintances.
Everyone deserves respect for their personal space, gender, sexuality, ethnicity, or race, even if you don’t know them. It’s easy to be disrespectful to people who hold different beliefs. Think about the way we treat others with different political or religious views—the disrespect is palpable. If we respected each other and each other’s beliefs, we would be much better off than constantly “dissing” one another.
Consider how you want to be remembered. Do people think of you as someone who treated them unfairly, or are you remembered for your kind words and helpful attitude? I want to leave this earth knowing I treated others well. Sadly, some people don’t care, often because they’ve been mistreated themselves.
Time and time again, people are hurt and beaten down. So it’s easy to ask, “Why treat others well when no one has treated me that way?”
The Cost of Bitterness: What Happens When We Stop Being Kind?
There are many broken and hurt people in this world, often because of disrespect, theft, betrayal, and cruelty. If you’ve experienced these things, I understand your viewpoint. But can you say you’re truly happy? Living with a closed-off, distrustful mindset may feel safe, but it also closes off opportunities for happiness.
I want to be able to trust others and have meaningful relationships. Of course, some situations call for serious help, but for those who avoid relationships because of past hurts, life can become mundane. Life is meant to be full of enriching relationships and experiences, shared with people you love and trust.
Bitterness and hate limit your life. You don’t meet new people, and you don’t give others a chance. Instead, you keep yourself confined to a narrow circle of influence. Life involves taking risks; yes, someone may hurt you, but that doesn’t mean you should hurt them in return. The “eye for an eye” mentality doesn’t lead to true happiness.
Why Leading with Kindness and Respect Changes Your Life
The Bible shifted from “eye for an eye” to forgiveness, urging people to treat others with kindness. Embracing this approach can truly change your life. Watch as you begin to treat others with respect, even if they haven’t earned it.
If you don’t know where to start, LifeWay has a great article on ways to show kindness to others.
Ultimately, people won’t be able to say you wronged them—they can only say you gave them a chance. Like my second-grade buddy gave to me, I try to extend the benefit of the doubt to others.